Thursday, September 24, 2009


by Danny M.
Edited by Vicki M.

Gollum bit off the finger Frodo, thus obtaining the ring, and began to rejoice in his victory. Meanwhile, Sam revived from being unconscious, only to see Gollum with the ring, and Frodo on the ground with his finger bleeding away. Sam stood up, drew his sword, and said in his cracking, weary voice, "Drop the ring Gollum! You horrible filthy hunk o' C-," he was interrupted by Frodo who yelled in warning, "Sam! No Sam. Not that way."

Gollum heard these words and was very much disturbed. He looked at himself and saw the ugly skin, his feet ugly and dirty, standing on the beautiful dirt. What was Sam going to say before he was interrupted?

"You filthy what?" Gollum said losing interest in the golden ring that was finally his.

"Sam, don't," said Frodo. However, Sam's hate for Gollum was too great; so, before Frodo could stop him, he blurted out, "You’re nothin’ but a hunk o' CGI!"

Gollum began whirling around glancing frantically at himself and crying, "What precious?! No! Nooooooo! Not us! Impossible! Nooooooo!"

Frodo was so upset at what Sam had done, that he yelled, "Gollum! It's alright! Look at this bitten off finger! It's all CGI gunk! All residents of Middle-Earth are part CGI!"

Sam heard this and was shocked. He examined himself, from his curly, messed up hair to his filthy feet. He looked at his clothes. He looked at his face in the reflection of his sword.

"I am not!" he said stubbornly. Frodo sighed and put his good hand on his head. Gollum however was made even madder.

"No! Fat, stupid hobbit isn't! Oh, no. But poor Sméagol! We're a hunk of CGI, precious! AAAAAAAH!" With this, Gollum fell backwards into the lava with the ring, and all lived happily ever after. Except for Gollum, that is.

The End